How to Immediately Improve Your Life (Hint: It Starts With Improving the Lives of Others)

by Arianna Huffington

Last week a few HuffPost editors and I were treated to a visit by Bill Drayton and Mary Gordon. Bill Drayton is the founder of Ashoka and a longtime champion of social entrepreneurship, a term that he coined and that has now spread across the world. Mary Gordon is a former kindergarten teacher who founded Roots of Empathy, an organization dedicated to teaching emotional literacy and promoting empathy in children. She was also one of the first Ashoka fellows. Our visit started with talk of the newborn recently welcomed by one of our editors, Gregory Beyer, whereupon Mary presented him with a onesie with "Empathy Teacher" emblazoned on the front. But as Mary -- a great empathy teacher herself -- told us, it's a two-way street, and empathy is best nurtured by example. "Love grows brains," she told us. "We need to show children a picture of love as we raise them."

And giving not only nurtures empathy; it's an outgrowth of our innate capacity for empathy. It's also one of the key components of HuffPost's Third Metric initiative to redefine success beyond the first two metrics of money and power to include well-being, wisdom, and our ability to wonder and to give -- all of which are boosted when we give our time and effort to something other than ourselves.

Philosophers have known this for centuries. "No one can live happily who has regard for himself alone and transforms everything into a question of his own utility," wrote the first-century Stoic philosopher Seneca in his Moral Letters to Lucilius. And in practically every religious tradition and practice, giving of oneself is a key step on the path to spiritual fulfillment. Or, as Einstein put it, "only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile."

Since Einstein, scientists have been trying to come up with the "theory of everything," which would explain our entire physical world by reconciling general relativity with quantum physics. In the study of our emotional world, there's no analogous theory of everything, but if there were, empathy and giving would be at the center of it. And modern science has overwhelmingly confirmed the wisdom of those early philosophers and religious traditions.
Empathy, compassion, and giving -- which is simply empathy and compassion in action -- are the building blocks of our being. With them we flourish; without them we perish.

In his book The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom, Jonathan Haidt writes that "caring for others is often more beneficial than receiving help. We need to interact and intertwine with others; we need the give and take; we need to belong."

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4 Steps for Creating A Budget That Maximizes Your Happiness

by GoGirlFinance 

 

While the word budget makes many people cringe, budgets are just a tool we have available to consciously allocate our spending in ways that make us the happiest. Doesn’t that sound much better? Here’s how to do it in 4 easy steps.

Understand your “Pie”

 

At any given point in time, we have a certain amount of money available for spending. I call it our “pie.” Yes, that amount can increase through a promotion or raise, passive income or an inheritance, but for budgeting purposes, at this point in time, our pie is set.

The first step in making a budget is to figure out what you have available to allocate. What is your annual income? Do you earn any additional money from other sources? The total is what we have available to allocate to maximize our happiness. While we can reasonably expect that our income will be at a certain level, it’s never set in stone. Make a realistic forecast and adjust as needed. Protect yourself with a rainy day fund. While this doesn’t seem like the most fun use of your hard earned money, the piece of mind and financial independence might make you happier than you’d expect.

Ideally, as our pie increases we don’t lever up our lifestyle to meet it. For example, just because you receive a promotion at work doesn’t mean you have to live in a more expensive apartment or get a more expensive gym membership. Make a conscious choice to use the increase for your most important financial goals.

Figure out What Makes You Happy (and what doesn’t)

 

Sometimes we spend on things that don’t actually make us happy just because we think we should. How much of what you’re spending is for you and your goals? Do you actually hate shopping but feel pressure to keep up with the latest trends? Are you spending on fancy cable channels that you wish you watched less of? What are you spending on that truly bring you joy?

Here is your chance to reflect on your spending over the last year. What brought you happiness and what could you do without? Watching your student loan balance go down might bring you great joy and satisfaction. Saving for a down payment on an apartment might make you feel financially secure.

Rank or prioritize your current spending. What’s really important, somewhat important or not important at all? There might be things that would make you very happy that you’re currently not spending on. Add them to the list! Be honest with yourself. This is your opportunity to decide what’s important.

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How To Get Stuff Done And Avoid Lying Awake At 3am...

by Hollie Slade, Forbes Staff

Ever find yourself lying awake at night thinking simultaneously thinking about next week’s big pitch and remembering you forgot to buy cat food?

“Your head is for having ideas not holding ideas,” says David Allen author of bestselling, Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity. Thinking ‘it’s all up here’ or ‘I’ll remember’ as you go from task to task inevitably means things will fall through the cracks and cortisol levels will rise.

Externalize your thoughts

“Most entrepreneurs have somewhere between 35 to 80 projects they’re working on,” says Allen. Unfortunately, “your head is a terrible office,” and so grabbing a pen and paper and writing everything down is the first step in externalizing all the competing buzzing thoughts.

“Capture everything that’s got your attention,” says Allen. “Get specific about exactly what you’ve got to do and define your outcomes and actions.”

“Identify the steps involved in the processes you go through on a regular basis so you can begin optimizing, automating, and outsourcing them. This goes for everything from paying bills to social media to meal preparation at home,” says Ari Meisel, a serial entrepreneur and productivity expert.

Realizing exactly what you’ve committed to do is a great first step in organizing your thoughts in a coherent form. “It’s creating an inventory,” says Allen. That way you’ll have a map of all the things you’re focused on.

Lying awake at 3 am happens because you’re not being strategic about what you are and aren’t doing, says Allen. “The only way to be comfortable about what you’re not doing is to know exactly what you’re not doing,” he says.

A simple task like this goes a long way in defining exactly what your work is and you’ll know what you might need to outsource straight away.

“People hold on to things in their psyche,” says Allen. “But your psyche doesn’t think strategically and tactically. You can’t do anything about it lying in bed.”

“Create an external brain where you write down every idea you have regardless of whether or not you think it’s good,” says Meisel. “Clear your mind. My favorite tool? Evernote,” he adds.

The Two Minute Rule
If you can do anything within two minutes you should do it then and there, says Allen. Otherwise you’ll just spend more time organizing it into another work flow.

If you can’t do it in two minutes consider outsourcing it to someone else but keep track of what you’ve handed over to other people.

Don’t wait to “follow up when it blows up,” says Allen.

“Get a virtual assistant,” says Miesel. “Use fancyhands or Zirtual to hire a virtual assistant. It’s an educational process for you in terms of how to effectively delegate and communicate a task.”

Maintenance
From there the next step is to keep the backlog low, making sure you’re ready for surprise and change. Making time each week to reflect is critical, says Allen. Close the door and step back, this is forest management not tree hugging, he says.

“This not a have a walk around the rose garden navel gazing kind of thing,” says Allen. It’s making sure you’re focusing your energy where it needs to be. “If you’re unwilling or unable to do this, the symptoms are that either the loudest thing emotionally or the nearest thing is going to capture your attention,” says Allen.

Read the full article and others from Forbes online.

15 Best Leadership Books Every Young Leader Needs To Read

by Joe Vennare

Reading is an essential life skill. It’s how we record our history and share stories. Sure, there are countless books jam-packed from cover to cover with valuable facts. But there are also limitless volumes containing invaluable insights on the human experience. Generations of people have scribed their experiences and struggles, their emotions and confessions onto blank pages, thereby transforming them into rich resources. Given this truth, it’s disheartening to report that global literacy rates are in decline. Individuals young and old all around the world are reading less, less absorbedly.

According to author John Coleman, this lack of literature extends into the business world and all the way up the corporate ladder. In his experience, “business people seem to be reading less.” Which is bad news considering the fact that “broad reading habits are often a defining characteristic of our greatest leaders.” Perhaps it’s because reading has been shown to improve communication, emotional intelligence, organizational effectiveness, and to reduce stress. All of which are critical requirements for an effective leader.

Now that you’ve been sufficiently convinced of the importance of reading, especially for would-be leaders, you’re probably wondering what you should be reading. You might also be thinking that you don’t have the time. Well, the truth is that you do have the time:
“reading must become as natural as eating and breathing to you.” You don’t have to read 52 books in a year, but you do have to make time for more reading. And when you do, this list of the 15 best leadership books will inform and inspire young leaders.

Lead yourself.

Before you can lead someone else, a group, or a company, you must be able to lead yourself. That means discipline, self-actualization, sense of purpose, and humility.
  
1. Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (Gregory Hays translation)
Although Aurelius was writing for himself, the surviving text is a road map to living a better life. By removing the excess, Aurelius shows us all how to rise above distractions to maintain our principles. Rooted in Stoic philosophy, Meditations is practical advice for controlling your thoughts, emotions, and actions to remove stress from your life.

2. Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankel

This book recounts Viktor Frankel’s experience in Auschwitz, the Nazi prison camp, during the Holocaust. Through all the pain and suffering Frankel was able to maintain perspective and conclude that there “must be meaning in suffering.” He reminds us that the meaning of life is to define that meaning for ourselves through action.

3. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

Life is a journey. Each one of us should be trying to follow our own personal legend (that is, what you have always wanted to accomplish). The tale of Santiago, a shepherd boy, reveals what happens when we pursue our own legend: “the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

Define leadership.

After building your foundation from which to lead, it’s important to understand exactly what leadership is and how it’s applied. It’s also helpful to study other successful leaders and businesses.

Read the full article online.